Sunday, March 27, 2005

Admission: As I'm sure all of you have realized by now, this, like most of the blogs on the Internet, is not actually a real blog.

I know a lot of you have had a hard time understanding the blogosphere / livejournal / typepad craze. You've dabbled in reading this popular blog or that little blog for a while, but overall, after reading your 1,000,000th "Lost is such a cool show" or "My significant other is such a dork! He/she thinks I talk about them behind their back, and I don't! He/she is such a meddling, trouble-making finger-pointer!" or "The Gladioluses are coming in nicely this year"-style posts, you decided there was nothing to this blogging thing.

But an overwhelming suspicion kept gnawing at you that there was something more to it--after all, why else would so many people read them?

Well, you were right. Blogs are not the musings and ramblings of everyday people who think that random passers-by would be interested in their day-to-day lives or their opinions about things you've already heard everybody's opinions about.

They are actually a highly developed system for conveying information over the internet in code.

Really, only two types of people surf the internet. The first are the people who want to send coded messages (terrorist groups, revolutionaries, the people who screwed up Star Trek, the little gnomes in Switzerland, etc.). The second are the people trying to decode their messages (Homeland Security, FBI, CIA, the IRS, and cryptology majors).

Oh, and there's you.

So, in the interest of 100% disclosure, I'm going to admit right here, out in the open, no code involved, that this blog actually contains coded instructions for the slow emergence of the Underworld Dwellers of Thryandia to begin their slow assimilation into above ground societies, leading to the eventual takeover of the entire Upperworld.

I invite all other bloggers to come clean as well.

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